I Got My Hopes Set High

Hi everybody!

Amy Grant had a song called "I Got My Hopes Set High" several years ago. For a long time in my life, I went with the attitude that I was not going to get my hopes up because I don't want to get disappointed. In one way I live that way now... when it comes to the medical news that I may get on a day to day basis I pretty much take each bit the same.  Good and bad alike- because if not--life's roller coaster (as you know) can take over.  

Dad taught me long ago that the weather should never dictate what kind of day you have. Just like Prince, who when told at the Super Bowl it was pouring down rain, he said "Can you make it pour harder?"

Here is the score of how things went for me this past week or so:

Feeling well:  3 days
Feeling rotten: 4 days
Feeling fair: 2 days

The thing is... Good or bad, these changes are each part of my story. If I let them dictate how I feel - by reacting / over-reacting then I end up giving away my "mo-joy".  

Then yesterday happened. I went into my appointment with this sort of approach -- basically ready for the bad news that I was not going to be able to go home because of blah blah potassium and blah blah magnesium and my blah blah platelets are too blah blah blah.  Then Kristin the nurse practitioner said:  "Well your blood work looks fantastic!"  and "I don't see any reason that anyone needs you to stay here:)"  I then totally didn't take my own advice and completely overreacted -- Hugged and Kissed Kristin and then Happy Danced the whole way out the door!!  

Thanks, everybody for all your cheering me on and concerns too.  I get it – believe me, my coming home doesn't come without A LOT of conditions.  Daily heparin flush to the pic line, dressing and cap changes, bloodwork, medications schmedications, communication with Doctor in Erie and Doctors in Houston, enough rest, steering clear of sickos, Watching Dan work outside from my chair on the new deck (just kidding honey), HAVING SOME FUN AND EATING WITH FAMILY AND FRIENDS, and SINGING.

As you can probably tell from the last post I am under spectacular care with my daughter and all the rest of my amazing family.  I got to spend 5 spectacular days with my BIG BROTHER BEAR Banjo Barry Smith who came down this past week.  

He wore lots of hats:  Chauffeur, pic line flusher, Chef,  Band Mate, and not least of which Counselor.  We even went to the theatre on Saturday night to Malpaso Dance Company with Afro Latin Jazz Arturo O'Farrill Orchestra. Brilliant and Fantastic in every way.

We played music in the treehouse for Dixie's Garden Tour where I got to sing one of my favorite Hymns: In the Garden with Rich Latimer on guitar.  Then we recorded "Ring them Bells" -Bob Dylan tune Monday night in Rich's studio.

When would I ever have the chance to spend such precious time with family as I have been able to do?  Plus I think my magnesium and potassium were up because of all that amazing guacamole!! 

Here's a poem in honor of my dear daughter Bekah who by example is teaching me how to care better for others.  

Lots of Love to you all,

L

Bekah Boogie 

Flitting nose chiseled chin
Glancing eyes, flowered grin

“Nothing distinctive” thou dost declare
“Unique unusual fair or rare”

“Mostly pretty fine but plain”
Rosy lens with cloudy stain

Where such view began I wonder?
Blues current secured down under

My sappy sunny lens and eyes
See beauty fresh uncompromised

Beating moment hour day
Week year trips in graceful gaze

Sacred spark bold design
Masterpiece of light and line

Below waters dark deep flow
Mysterious languid undertow

Ideas held fast tightly lashed
Oh deep mines between lines

Deep! Steep! Go deeper still!
Plunging thought purest will

Dearest one whither come by
For the mind to thee may lie

What is that? Oh dear one hear!
Listen closely fix thine ear!

Lilting music lift thy head!
Lift thy spirit! Down with dread!

Oh dance free spirit child!
Dance 'round carefree wild!

Sure sound steady beat!
Swings thee upward to two feet!

Freedom loosed fantastic flit!
Jitter jive skipping split!

Leaping prancing “Priceless Noose”!
Bekah Boogie fully loosed!

Dervish spins thee to and fro!
Fervent twists mist and glow!

Now waltz. Slow it down
Gentle swaying swinging gown

Easy warm tender twirl
Peaceful pleasant quiet whirl

I lay thee down then to reap
Delicious dreams descending deep

Of Solomon’s sweet counsel gain
A season for everything to attain

Knitted all together thee tell
Of time to grieve and dance as well 

--Linda Dee Smith, May 2016